only Tuesday

I woke up this morning and thought....it’s only Tuesday. I’m counting down to the end of this week so I can have 5 days off. I’m going away for the weekend and then having a few days at home to do very little. People have commented that I should go away for longer but I can’t help but think how nice it will be to have some time at home to do nothing. No work, no flatmates during the day, day time tv, sleeping all just sounds lovely to me and exactly what I need.

I’m not sure when life go so busy but I feel like I am constantly on the go. By the time we get through our working week, it’s the weekend and that is full of washing, cleaning, cooking, gardening etc. When you think about it, none of that stuff is really important. I would prefer to spend my time catching up with friends or having some time to myself.

I thought life was busy and then I started dating again! Dating is time consuming and nerve racking so it uses up a lot of energy! I’m pleased to say I’m in a good place in my relationship now but we got to a point where between me meeting his friends, him meeting mine and having time to get to know each other it was sooooo busy and overwhelming!  

Hello again....

Well let's try this again. Life has been crazy recently and instead of keeping the challenges and highlights to myself I'm going to share them. This is in the hope that one day someone may benefit from me sharing my story. I was first diagnosed with depression over 5 years ago and while I'm quite open about it, there is still a definite stigma attached to it. Part of coping for me is to talk about how things are for me and to be able to verbalize what I need to help me cope. I've become better at acknowledging that I need space, take a moment to breathe when I need it and having people around me when I'm feeling flat. I'm also very lucky that I have wonderful friends that so supportive. So this blog started as a record of life as a 'stepmum', then singledom and now the focus has shifted again to be just about me and how I cope with life....trying to be positive and smile :)

Smiling!

Well I've had a good day, I actually slept five hours straight last night!! It doesn't sound like much but for me it's an achievement. I'm hoping tonight is another good sleep.

So today this is what I'm grateful for:
1. My health and ability to now run again!
2. New beginnings (I know I've given new beginnings in the past but I'm starting to embrace it)
3. My team at work who make me laugh and keep me on my toes
4. Friends who are there without question
5. Growing up and being able to face my fears and challenges

I'm a bit happy tonight, I think my exercise session is going to my head!

Take two

Yes yes I know it's been too long between blogs and a few people have commented on that!

So quickly here are 10 things that have happened to me in the last two weeks:
1. Got bought out of an investment property
2. Bought someone out of another place
3. Had a flatmate move out with no notice
4. Saw the little girls I used to live with (amazing!)
5. Found a new flat mate who moved in promptly
6. Learnt some new crafty things
7. Attended a christening and a 1st birthday party
8. Got cornered about a blind date
9. Grew webbed feet as a result of all the rain
10. Got hooked on MyKitchen Rules and Revenge!

So it's been a crazy few weeks but overall I'm beginning to feel much stronger :)

The Weekend!

Gotta love the weekends.....time to relax, catch up with friends and do the things we love. So much so I haven't blogged for a few days :)

Here is the final installment of the 95 questions....

What makes you feel comfortable? being in my bed, in my house
What’s something about you that has never changed? my loyalty towards my friends
What will be different about your life in exactly one year? hopefully I will be more accepting of my single status and looking forward to the idea of dating. But at the moment that is a while off!
What mistakes do you make over and over again? sometimes i am too nice and don't say no when i should
What do you have a hard time saying “no” to? my negative thoughts
Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? there is no point doing something you don't believe in. I think you get to a point where if you don't believe in it then it's not worth it, for me I think of my job and am lucky to be in a role where I do really place importance on the policy area I work on.
What’s something that used to scare you, but no longer does? Being single used to scare me beyond words but I am slowly growing more comfortable with it.
What promise to yourself do you still need to fulfill? that I will go on a holiday overseas
What do you appreciate most about your current situation? the support I have from my colleagues, friends and family. In times of stress you really do find out who truly supports you unconditionally.
What’s something simple that makes you smile? seeing my friends children achieve new things
So far, what has been the primary focus of your life? my family and being self sufficient
How do you know when it’s time to move on? I think you just know
What’s something you wish you could do one more time? I can't think of anything right now
When you’re 90-years-old, what will matter to you the most? family and friends and being able to reflect on a life full of wonderful memories.
What would you regret not fully doing, being, or having in your life? I hope there are no regrets, I think there would be somethings I would say 'I wish I did that sooner' but the last few months has taught me that things happen for a reason (even though we don't often know at the time what that reason is).

Time will tell what I am meant to achieve in this life time :)

This weather sucks

I had an ok sort of day today, I'm a bit sick of this fake summer weather we are having here.....sunny days would be lovely. Rain rain go away :) 

More questions for you....well actually me!

What are you glad you quit? not sure
What do you need to spend more time doing? really relaxing
What are you naturally good at? craft
What have you been counting or keeping track of recently? days
What has the little voice inside your head been saying lately? something has to go right
What’s something you should always be careful with? people's hearts and feelings
What should always be taken seriously? your gut feeling
What should never be taken seriously? if the question was 'too seriously' then I'd say myself!
What are three things you can’t get enough of? chocolate, time with friends, sleep
What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? give my opinion more
What fascinates you? people
What’s the difference between being alive and truly living? be honest with yourself
What’s something you would do every day if you could? spend times with friends
At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? being newly heartbroken
Which is worse, failing or never trying? never trying
What makes you feel incomplete? sleep
When did you experience a major turning point in your life? at age 11
What or who do you wish you lived closer to? mum, little brother
If you had the opportunity to get a message across to a large group of people, what would your message be? life is to short, tell the people you love that you love them
What’s something you know you can count on? me

Valentine's Day

My view on Valentine's day was always that it was a bit over the top and a bit of a commercial holiday. But for some people it's a reminder that they need to make time for each other. I've been lucky enough to get flowers on Valentine's day before but I much prefer those little surprises throughout the year which remind you that you are loved and appreciated. I also appreciated the fact that there was a birthday at work which was a nice distraction.

I'm slowly making my way through the 95 questions to Happiness and I'm finding it really helpful.

What are you known for by your friends and family? over thinking and crying
What’s something most people don’t know about you? I had surgery last year
What’s a common misconception people have about you? that I'm a very confident person (I'm lucky I can pull that off at work!)
What’s something a lot of people do that you disagree with? not learning from mistakes
What’s a belief you hold with which many people disagree? can't think of anything right now
What’s something that’s harder for you than it is for most people? sleeping
What are the top three qualities you look for in a friend? loyalty, kindness, sincerity
If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow that person to be your friend? not sure
When you think of ‘home,’ what, specifically, do you think of? my bed
What’s the most valuable thing you own? my house
If you had to move 3000 miles away, what would you miss most? my girlfriends
What would make you smile right now? A phone call from a little friend
What do you do when nothing else seems to make you happy? a jigsaw puzzle
What do you wish did not exist in your life? depression
What should you avoid to improve your life? stressful situations that I can't control
What is something you would hate to go without for a day? my phone
What’s the biggest lie you once believed was true? good things come to those who wait
What’s something bad that happened to you that made you stronger? my parents separation
What’s something nobody could ever steal from you? my sense of hope
What’s something you disliked when you were younger that you truly enjoy today? avocado